‘Twas The Night Before Healthcare Reform
‘Twas the night before Christmas, and following the House
The Senators were blending their bill while some groused
The amendments were stuck to the bill without care
In hopes that Obama soon would be cheered
The Doctors and Patients were trying not to dread
The visions of full waiting rooms that flashed through their heads
All watched the TV, hoping to avoid new Red Tape
But confusing reports lead to a hypnotic state
When from my TV there arose such a clatter,
A Filibuster could come and Reform would then shatter.
Away to my laptop I went to check news
Fearing the options politicians could choose
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
May have given mid-day luster to objects below,
But I must confess, I didn’t care about any of that
Until Santa fell from my roof, he fell down with a splat.
Opening the door I looked out and there saw
St. Nick, clutching his ankle and dusted in snow
“My ankle, it’s twisted. I can’t bear any weight
But, I know you’re a doctor–so this must be fate
You see, I’ve a bundle of presents to carry
Not just toys but reform items, so I really can’t tarry”
As I reached for his ankle my curiosity grew
Reform items: what kind, how much, and for who?
Wishing the best for him but needing to know
I asked while I wrapped and earned a “Ho Ho!”
For the legislature I couldn’t carry the kind of an item you’d think
Their bills are too heavy, my sled they would sink
He explained that Reform weighs twenty-one pounds
Or did I really believe 2000 pages came light
When up on my roof we then both heard sounds
My reindeer, they’re ready; we must soon take flight
My ankle it’s better and I truly want to thank you
So he opened his magic bag, and oh, what a view
Words will fail me if I try to describe
The items he carries, there’s so much inside
And once I looked up, I was truly amazed
Bewildered and stunned my eyes a deep glaze
I said, how’d you fit so much, there in that sack
There isn’t much I can think that you lack
Why, scissors for Red tape, and Kool-aid for some
There’s wishful thinking, rules, regulations, and drums
Yet with so much in your bag, I don’t see Health Care
What about something more lasting to share
He laid his finger aside of his nose
And giving a nod, to my roof he then rose
As he sat in his sled and it started to fly
He yelled down below, asking me why?
Do you think I can really solve something like that
Remember, I’m Santa and goodwill is my rap
It’s hard to make something you hope no one hates
While the President watches, paces, and waits
A recipe mixing compromise and Red Tape
Is a gift to keep giving as inevitable as fate
Then I heard him exclaim, as he flew out of sight
Bill my insurance … and To All A Good Night!
Until next week, I remain yours in primary care,
Steve Simmons, MD
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